Thanks for giving!

Ok, I made it through Thanksgiving weekend in one piece. Whew!

First, there was the holiday. We packed up the three kids and headed over to my in-laws' for the day. They cooked up a feast for us, which was wonderful (as usual). My own mother was invited to join us, and she brought pork hocks and sauerkraut, a Polish tradition and disgusting, but my mother-in-law enjoys it as well, so the two moms happily dined on it. Blech! I can eat Frank's kraut, warmed from the can, nothing else on it, but not the Polish stuff, and certainly not the German stuff. Double Blech!! The kids all ate pretty well, even The Big Man. He had chicken fingers, as he doesn't eat turkey. I don't eat turkey either, so my father-in-law made me a steak (bless him!). He always cooks up some red meat for me, even though I've told him it's not necessary. I won't die if I don't eat the turkey- there's plenty of other stuff there to eat too!

My mom brought over her holiday flyers too, and she and my sister brave Black Friday every year to get some deals. They carefully plot their attack the night before, so they can get in and out of each store with what the want and with as little hassle as possible. I refuse to go (not that crazy...yet), but I wanted to look over their plan to see if there was anything I wanted them to pick up. Found a couple of things, nothing huge this year, so I added them to their list before she headed over to my sister's for their strategic meeting. We had to head home a little earlier than we planned, as The Little Man started melting away in desperate need of a nap mid afternoon, so we all parted ways at that point. It was a very nice holiday!

The weekend brought a wedding for me to coordinate at my church. It was interesting, to say the least. The ceremony (NOT mass) was to include a reading from "The Velveteen Rabbit"...yes, that would be the children's book...so I had to type that up, as we didn't have it listed in out standard book of readings. Imagine that. They also pulled their other readings off the Internet, I believe, so our copies were not the same as what they had, so I had to retype those as well. All this extra work had to be done the night before, after the rehearsal dinner. There were a number of family members who wanted to run the show, who had very little patience with the fact that my whole job is to tell everyone where to go and when. That's what I do- I COORDINATE THINGS. We all made it through though without a scratch (ok, a few), and the bride and groom were never the wiser, which is the most important part. I've had weddings go into almost complete meltdown, so this was definitely a good weekend.

The only really bad part was that their wheat stalks they used as decor left a huge mess in the gathering area, and I had to vacuum the whole thing before I left. This was very bad because my herniated discs do not allow for this sort of activity, but I had to do it. I will be paying for this for a long time. I still very much enjoy this ministry to the church though, even with a few kinks here and there. Keeps me on my toes, physically and mentally! :)

I really am just one big heaping pile of Jello

What Makes a Mother

I thought of you all, I closed my eyes and prayed to God today.

I asked what makes a Mother and I know I heard Him say,

"A Mother has a baby. This we know is true."

"But God, can you be a Mother when your baby's not with you?"

"Yes you can!", He replied, with confidence in His voice,

"I give many women babies, when they leave is not their choice.

Some I send for a lifetime and others for a day.

And some I send to feel your womb but there's no need to stay."

"I just don't understand this God, I want my baby here!"

He took a breath and cleared His throat and then I saw a tear.

"I wish I could show you what your child is doing today.

If you could see your child smile with other children and say,

'We go to earth to learn our lessons of love and life and fear.

My Mommy loved me oh so much, I got to come straight here.

I feel so lucky to have a Mom who had so much love for me

I learned my lesson very quick, My Mommy set me free.

I miss my Mommy oh so much, but I visit her each day.

When she goes to sleep on her pillow's where I lay.

I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek and whisper in her ear,

'Mommy don't be sad today! I'm your baby and I'm here.'

"So you see, my dear sweet one, your children are OK.

Your babies are here in my home, and this is where they'll stay.

They'll wait for you with me until your lesson is through.

And on that day that you come home, they'll be at the gates for you.

So now you see what makes a Mother: it's the feeling in your heart.

It's the love you had so much of, right from the very start.

Though some on earth may not realize that you are a Mother until their time is done.

They'll be up here with me one day and know you're the best one.

Written with love, for all the Mother's missing their babies, by Jennifer Wasik

I got this poem from someone a while back, when I really needed it. You see, The Diva, The Big Man, and The Little Man have 2 brothers and 2 sisters they've never met. Someday, when all is said and done, they will. We all will meet. I miss them desperately right now. This will soon pass, as it always does, but I go through periods of time when I miss my angel babies more than anything. I was deprived of being their mother and it's not fair- not to me, and not to them. It's not fair to my other kids that they missed out on having more brothers and sisters, and not fair that my husband didn't get to father them either. Life isn't fair.

My mortality is getting to me right now. I have yet to get a clean bill of health as far as this breast cancer thing is concerned. When I went to the doctor today, my mammography report said that there were some spots that were not able to be seen due to the fibrous tumors, so my OB/GYN (my lifesaver right now, both physically and emotionally) is speaking with the radiologist regarding the interpretation of his findings. It basically means, I'm not out of the woods yet. I'm doing ok I guess, but this is just irritating that I have to hurry up and wait, you know? I'm sure you've all been in a situation where you've been made to wait for results of a test and been totally stressed out about it. If it wasn't cancer-related, multiply your worry ten-fold!

I am feeling more like myself, now that my doc's had a chance to sit down with me and go over the results, and we've developed another plan from this point. We'll just take this as it comes, and she'll be there to support me. She's truly a Godsend right now! Just keep good vibes coming my way...I'll take all I can get right now. I will keep everyone posted on this matter, as well as some non-tear-inducing antics here one of these days.

The Big Man strikes back

We have a bit of a penchant for the dramatics here in our home. I believe my eldest son would come out on top if we were to have a contest to see who could argue semantics the longest, but not the loudest. I won't say who'd win that one. I am shocked and amazed at how this child, this mere babe in the woods, will go to the greatest of lengths to argue his position on anything I or Dad say. He will purposely take what we say out of context, so that it fits his needs at the time. He's learned this from The DIVA, however he's chosen to perfect this art form rather than take after her in the art of lying and manipulation. What can I say? He's blazing his own trail, and so I'm proud of him for that.


Tonight, I took The Big Man to the grocery store with me. It was just the two of us, which is rare, so I expected stellar behavior honestly. There wasn't anyone to fight with, right? WRONG!! I was there, so he took full advantage. Had he have been all alone, I think he would have picked a fight with a stranger tonight. I'm waiting for the black eye when he steps off the school bus one day, but I digress...


I went up and down the aisles in the store, as I always do, with The Big Man driving the cart. He didn't even ask for a million and one things, so maybe that should have put me on guard a little. Yes, that should have been the huge, waving red flag to tell me that something was amiss. I knew he was a bit tired, but weren't we all by dinnertime? I certainly didn't expect the backlash of disrespect and uncouth behavior that was thrown my direct without warning. It started when I simply asked him not to put bananas on top of the hamburger buns. What was I thinking, bringing such a ridiculous thing to his attention?! You would have thought I stabbed him in the ear, with the pirate one-eye-closed, facial-wrenching look he gave me, as he threw the food down and refused to continue helping me bag. I asked him what the problem was, and a stream of expletives that would make said pirate blush were hurled at me in a manner that made a large number of other shoppers turn around and look at me with disgust. HEY! I didn't say it!!


If I didn't have a cart full of stuff to deal with, already paid for and waiting to go to my car, I'd have dragged him out and let him have it. When I say that, I mean, I'd have slapped his mouth, put him in the car, and hollered at him while speeding home, so that most people (other than those in cars around me at stoplights) were unable to here me while I reprimanded him for his little stunt. NO, I don't beat my kids. Yes, I probably should have been a bit more firm when they were younger and (possibly) prevented this, but hindsight is always 20/20. I have a great aunt who, before she passed on, would wallop her kids one and say "That's for nothing, now try something!" Needless to say, the preemptive crack kept them from starting their crap, in public or in private. Those were different times though.


I don't lay a hand on any of my kids often, and if I do, it's enough to say, "HEY! INAPPROPRIATE!!" Never have I even hurt them. They usually laugh in my general direction afterwards, if it's any consolation to you nay-sayers. The Big Man wasn't even mad at me really, he just had a hard day at school today and was tired, so who better to take that out on than the person who'll love you unconditionally, no matter what, right? I didn't lay a hand on him tonight though, nor did I yank him out of the store. I held myself together and packed up the groceries, loaded the van, and drove home. I let Dad take care of it! I'm a rotten mother and a terrible human being, so sue me. I'm sure everyone reading this right now has never done a single thing wrong in their lives. I'm fine with my imperfections, and I'll stick Dad with it on occasion. He deserves it sometimes...na na na boo boo!

My face, coming to an Internet near you!

Everyone has heard about all of these social networking sites, so I won't start naming them all. If you haven't, you've been living under a rock, in the farthest part of Siberia, under a huge snowbank as well. Global warming is the only reason you are here reading this today.

I think these sites are great to reconnect with those people we've lost touch with after high school or college. I have a page of my own, although I'm not going to link it here, to protect the innocent. I know that my old boyfriends would be ashamed if I started dragging their names and faces through the mud (again), so I'll just keep that part of my life separate (for now). These sites are full of people looking for old pals, as well as new ones. They're also in search of love out there in cyberspace, which is all well and good too. MY problem with them comes in when parents let their young kids get a page and make it public for the whole world to see, literally. I can't comprehend this. But then again, maybe it's the meanness coming out. I think it is...here is comes...

The DIVA got caught tonight with a page on one of these sites. It was set up two days ago, unbeknownst to me or her father, and she got ratted out by The Big Man too. She was supposed to be helping with the laundry in the basement, not helping herself to the computer in my office. I wasn't standing there over her shoulder, thinking that since she's 12, she could conduct herself in an appropriate manner and I could trust her word that she was actually doing laundry down there. Silly me. I am not amused by this. I believe I used a few expletives in my tirade (ok, a lot of them), as well as the words "pervert" and"pedophile", and the phrase "what the hell were you thinking?!" a number of times (lost count at 100). My darling child used her real name, her real zip code, and used "sexxxy" to describe herself. She has "friends" whose photos show them half-naked. WTF?!?! Sorry...I'm really overemotional right now. I made the assumption that I was bringing up my kids properly, that they knew the difference between right and wrong. I have been over personal and Internet safety with both of the older ones, as have their schools, so I'm really confused as to how this page came to be. Needless to say, the page no longer exists.

I am the World's Meanest Mom and will not allow my children online like this! These sites are NOT designed for children, and when I say "children", I mean anyone under 18. Some of the content on there is not meant for kids, although the sites claim to be keeping it clean and have ways to report inappropriate content. If you have allowed your child to have a page like this, think about why you've allowed it. Is it to contact friends they already have? If so, isn't that what school or the phone is for?! Most, if not all, of them are using these pages to contact new friends, of various ages, with various types of photos on their own pages, and if you are not watching them closely, you could have a very serious problem on your hands. The DIVA tells me about how her friend was contacted by a boy who said he was 14 but really was 31. NICE! My sister-in-law has mentioned my niece being online as well, and I have warned her about this same stuff. The Internet is a scary place, and if you think it won't happen to you, think again. The guy around the corner from us is a convicted pedophile...our homeowners association is in litigation to have him evicted for conducting illegal activities in the neighborhood, since he surfed the stuff at home too. Sicko.

If you are letting your kids online, use IMSafer to try and monitor what's happening with their IM's and chat logs. Go to http://www.imsafer.com/ to download your FREE copy. It will help you keep track of what your kids are saying online, if they're trying to arrange meeting, if they're talking to people older than they should be, so USE IT. Keep your kids safe however you can.

Don't make me have to come over there!

My Prison Name

My WHAT?!

Yes, my Prison Name! I was just as stunned as you when I was reading this in a post on http://www.cafemom.com/, but I thought, what the hey? I'll try it out.

My prison name is

The Polish Assassin!

This is absolutely hilarious to me, and upon finding out my new name, I was laughing hysterically (which, if you read my previous post, I desperately needed). My husband was getting on me about it because The Little Man had just gone to bed, and apparently my high-pitched cackling was going to keep him awake. Yeah, right. This is the child who will fight sleep until the wee hours of the morning, well past the time when his father has been peacefully snoring and keeping the NEIGHBORS in the next zip code awake. But God forbid I laugh. Now why was I laughing like a maniac? Because I'm actually Polish. What are the odds?! Granted, I'm not an actual assassin, but I have felt like killing some people in the last 48 hours here. I think it's funny and if you can't give me that, well...I have a few choice words I won't say right now, let's put it that way. Maybe I should start embroidering The Polish Assassin on my undies for when I go into the Big House after the meanness gets the best of me. MWUAHAHAHAHA! If you want to find out what your name would be, please visit http://www.quizpox.com/quiz.php?id=9 and let me know to whom I should address your Christmas card.

I'm passing the crown

No, not THAT crown, silly! The other crown I wear...the one that says I have to be the strong one who fixes everything. The one that says I have to be the one who makes everything ok and smooths it all over. I've decided to pass that one off, so if you want it, it's yours. I have recently had a health scare, and I'm not afraid to talk about it. If fact, it really helps to do so, as I've had a head full of worry and need to get it out before it pops clean off!

Last week, I had a post-op appointment with my OB/GYN, after my Novasure procedure. For those of you who've never heard of it, Novasure is a new, faster way to perform an endometrial ablation. You can read more about it at http://www.novasure.com/, if you have "female problems" to address. Anyway, the procedure went great- no more periods for me, evah! WOO HOO!!! So, this is all going great, when we get to the part where I have to have my annual breast exam. We didn't get a chance to do it at my last visit a month prior, as it was a hectic one. My doctor, whom I'd also consider a friend, asked me if I'd noticed any changes at all, so I told her about the pain I'd been having on the right side, that had been present for at least a year. I'd also noticed some small bumps in both breasts that had been present since nursing my Little Man, who's 2 now, so again, more than a year on those too. I just attributed all of this to changes that occurred when my breasts changed from hormones during pregnancy and nursing...no biggie, right?


WRONG!


I got the distinct pleasure of being frightened out of my wits now. My doctor scheduled me for a diagnostic mammogram at The Breast Center, which I thought maybe I'd be able to avoid for a few more years. There's a strong history of breast and gynecological cancer in my family, so I knew I'd have to be diligent in the coming years, just not this soon. The earliest they could see me over there was a week later, so I get to spend this week waiting impatiently to find out what the hell is going on here. It was not the most pleasant of weeks, let me tell you.

I spent my time trying to immerse myself in my work. Were I not a Family Traditions Consultant, this wouldn't be so hard! My work consists of talking to people about how to start new traditions with their families, and how to instill values in their children. I also teach them how to leave their legacy for the generations to come. I show them how to create albums of their family's memories, photos, stories, whatever they want to preserve for their children and grandchildren. You can see how this could be paining for someone who could be facing the Big C here! I tried really hard to stay away from that, but it didn't work, so I faced it head-on. I decided exactly how things would go if I ended up having breast cancer, so here is the plan...

If I have cancer, The DIVA, The Big Man, and The Little Man will NOT be informed of my condition. They seen their mother sick enough, and they don't need to worry. I go to doctor's appointments all the time, with physical therapy and such, so they are used to me doing that and will think nothing of regular appointments with oncology. I see no reason to further disrupt their lives when I'm sure I'll be at a stage where we can beat this. If it's determined I have to go through chemo, I will then have a Head-Shaving Party with my closest family and friends. We'll send the kids to stay with Grandma and Grandpa or Grandmama, so they don't ask questions. I plan to have these folks help cut my hair, then I'll send it off to have it made into a wig for myself. This will further conceal my condition. I also don't wish to have clumps of it falling out all over the place! I know that this may seem rash to some, but this is the way I want it. If I have some control, I will feel better about this...I don't care how others feel, it's about how I feel.

So, fast forward the week to November 15...My husband and I arrive at The Breast Center. He has to stay in the waiting room, which bothers me, but I understand, as it's an X-ray after all. I get prepared, and the technologist and I talk about how to proceed. She says she thinks, due to my age and the density of my breasts, we should do the ultrasound first because the mammogram probably won't show them what they need to see anyway. I say whatever, she's the boss, since I've never done this before. She talks to the radiologist, who says we should shoot a few pics, to have a baseline, since that's what my doctor ordered, and then we'll do the ultrasound after that. Ok, let's get this over with! We do two top shots and two side shots. The technologist tells me to wait right here, we'll do the ultrasound in a few minutes, and she goes to show the shots to the radiologist. In what seemed like 10 seconds, she comes back in and tells me everything's clear and I can go home. I was both surprised and baffled, since that was A) not the original plan, and B) not sure what "clear" meant, so I started asking questions. She wasn't willing to answer any of them and kept referring me back to my regular doctor. I asked about what was found- was it cysts? was it 'masses'? what are we looking at here? She said "Everything needs to be followed up in clinic now." When I left my doctor's office the week prior, she had told me that The Breast Center would handle everything from that point on, so now I was TOTALLY CONFUSED...AND HURT...AND SCARED EVEN MORE!

So I left. I got myself dressed, walked out to the waiting room, and got my husband, who was surprised to see me. He was expecting to come back and join me for the ultrasound because they had come out there and told him that prior to my appearance! He was just as confused as I was, sans the hurt and scared part, at this point. I was on the phone with my doctor's office before I hit the parking ramp. I finally get a call returned, from one of the triage nurses, who is just as vague on the results, if not more so. If I could have strangled someone at this point, I think I would have. A person's health in relation to a possible cancer diagnosis is nothing to screw around with, people! My doc was out of the office, otherwise I would have spoken with her directly. I now have an appointment with her on 11/26 to get my official results, as well as a plan of action from here. I'm hurt, angry, disgusted, scared, worried, stressed frustrated, just about every single emotion one can have, all rolled into one right now. The waiting game continues.

My gut tells me that I will be ok. My brain tells me that something is brewing, and I need to cover all my bases, just to be sure. The woman on Good Morning America (her name escapes me right now) had her mammogram, but they missed her cancer. Had she not have had the ultrasound, they never would have found it. I'm worried that I'll be in that category, especially since my family history is very strong AND nothing every seems to go right for me medically. I have to try and relax and make it through the holiday with a smile on my face, but I'm melting emotionally inside. I am a stoic women, and I don't normally let this sort of thing affect me like this, but this time is very different for me. I can't say "I'll be ok, I'll make it through" with complete certainty this time around. Let someone else stand up and wear the "Big Girl" crown right now.

Pray for me, send good vibes, whatever it is you do...I'd appreciate it. My kids, if they knew, would appreciate it too.

Woo Hoo!...I can dream, can't I?

Does the sight of these men interest you?

What about this one?

Ok, last chance here. ANYTHING?!

Fine, I will admit it to the world. I have a "thing" for Harry Potter. The series, not the boy...although Daniel Radcliffe is a fine actor in every sense of the word. ;) I was happy to hear that he will be reprising his role in Equus on Broadway here in the US in the fall of 2008. I just might have to find a ticket to New York. Would that be an odd thing...?

Anyway, back on topic! The point of my post is to say that I don't know that I can continue to wait any longer for the next Harry Potter movie, The Order of the Phoenix, to come out on DVD. It's only a few more weeks, but it seems like forever. I think I hate the wait more than my kids, which is both hilarious and frightening at the same time. I scare myself and others at times- he he!

I have a friend (who just might read this!) who happens to live outside and work in London. I have to say, I have given him quite the row on a few occasions, due to the fact that he has yet to pick up a Harry Potter book or see a movie. I think this is blasphemy in the HP world! I think he'd love the read, quite honestly, even thought he's very classically trained when it comes to literature. I find the books to be very engaging for the imagination, and one can immerse themselves in the wizarding world, which can be done nowhere else (other than the movies). Sir J, if you are reading this tonight, I implore you, please pick up The Philosopher's Stone! If you don't, I'm going to spend the money and mail it to you for Christmas, whether you like it or not. HRRMPH! *slams door* ;)

The mean-meanie-est part of being a mom in regards to Harry Potter is that I get to hog the DVD until I've watched it myself. MWUAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I don't hand it over, nor do I watch it with the kids, until I've had a chance to lie in bed and relax and view it alone at least once. I take to my bed with MY DVD...so what?! They get over it. I usually fall asleep watching the older movies on a regular basis. I find them very relaxing, but I don't really know why. Maybe it's because they have a certain darkness to them. Maybe it's because my husband doesn't bother me when I watch them, as he'd rather watch football or reruns of something else. Maybe it's that Harry Potter is my personal escape from the real world, when everything else is so friggin' crazy around here, and I don't have to think at all about it. I'm entitled to one vice, and if this is the only one I have, since I don't drink heavily or smoke or chase men, I think I'm doing ok. Well, maybe I might chase these men...if I were single. ;)

Dr Mom

On the battlefield, gaping wounds were dressed with whatever was available at the time. Luckily, this happened in my kitchen, where the first aid kit was readily available. If all else failed, I did have needle and thread available too. It almost came to that...

I was trying to get some much-needed rest. The DIVA has been begging for more responsibility around here, so I gave it to her. She and The Big Man were to keep an eye on The Little Man while I went to lay down for a bit, since I hadn't slept in days (for various reasons), and The DIVA was also allowed to make cookies with the new cookie dough we got from her chorus fundraiser. She was thrilled! I think this was more about the cookies though than the watching-your-brother part, as the melee ensued as soon as I was out of earshot (or so they thought).

I just let them squabble out the simple stuff- what to watch on tv, who was going to play what with The Little Man, where his cup was, blah, blah, blah. I didn't move. It wasn't going to draw any blood, right? Well, apparently not in this case. All of a sudden, The Little Man starts to shriek a shriek of pain, not the usual "I'm not getting my way" shriek. The DIVA yells at The Big Man to quit hitting The Little Man, who then shouts back that he never touched him and that The Little Man is bleeding. The DIVA comes out to the living room from the kitchen to inspect the damage, then freaks out and hollers up to me, "MOM! THE LITTLE MAN'S BLEEDING REALLY BAD! YOU GOTTA COME DOWN, QUICK!"

I believe I flew down the stairs, as I don't recall my feet actually hitting the floor. As I catapult over the baby gate at the bottom, I see my youngest son covered- yes, COVERED- in his own blood, with a pool of it on the hardwood floor at his feet, standing there screaming. The DIVA is holding his hands, which somewhere hold the source of the gushing, as she continues to freak out. The Big Man has locked himself in the powder room, scared to death from all the blood. I don't blame him at this point. I try to calm everyone (including myself!) and take my baby's hands to try and see where the blood is coming from, and it appears to be the pointer on his right hand. I inspect further, and I see a very deep gash, caused by God-knows-what. I am livid but have no time to deal with that right now. There are more pressing matters.

I scoop up the baby and head to the powder room, leaving a trail of tears and blood, and I shoo my eldest son out so I may prepare for surgery, STAT. I get the first aid kit, but there's nothing to use for a tourniquet, so I just grab a wad of Kleenex, hold it on there, and try to elevate his hand. He's slowly fading in my arms, part from blood loss and part from crying and being scared, so he just lays on my shoulder and cries while I continue treatment. I had him sitting on the counter at this point, so I could use both hands to fix him and cuddle him at the same time. I got out the gauze, stretchy bandages, and antibacterial cream, and I settled in to work. I removed the Kleenex, and we had a pumper! I got worried at this point, so I called the nurse line, as of course, this was a Saturday. She said as long as it quits within a half hour, we should be ok. I then fashioned him a gauze & stretchy bandage finger cover, tight enough to stop the bleeding right around a half hour later....when he was sleeping on my bed, watching Toy Story (yes, Toy Story- don't ask).

Oh, I forgot! It might interest you to know how my precious little friend received this awful war wound. Whilst his loving sister and brother were in the middle of their "you do it, I'm not going to watch him!" argument, The Little Man had gone over to meddle in the recyclables bag, which hangs on the door leading to the garage. In it, he found an opened can of corn- you know, the kind where the lid hadn't been opened all the way, and was attached by just a little edge? Well, he decided it needed to come out, so he reached in and pulled on it, on the jagged edge, and voila! Instant amputation!! I seriously thought the boy would have to have stitches on this, but judging from this photo, he seemed to have made it through just fine. (Note the fabulous McNamara/Troy repair job I've done to his finger here- I'll post an 'after' in a week or two...please feel free to email for appointments.)

As for The DIVA and The Big Man...they didn't get yelled at for this at all. The sight of all the blood, helping me patch up their brother by handing me supplies, The DIVA helping clean things up, all were punishment enough for them. They were scared out of their minds, and both were more sincerely apologetic than they had ever been before in their lives. I didn't feel the need to have a freak-out session on them at all. To tell you the truth, I felt sorry for them after all was said and done. I hugged them both and simply said, "It's ok. The Little Man will be ok. If you apologize to anyone, apologize to him." And they did. Both of them kissed his little baby finger, and it was very sweet. I am quite sure they learned their lesson about listening, about helping out, and about the fact that their little brother will be ten steps ahead of them if they're not watching very closely!

Get out your checkbooks for this Picasso, folks!

This is what happens when you look away for only a few moments...

My precious Little Man was seated on my bed, literally on my feet, as we watched the Backyardigans this afternoon. He was quietly sitting there, just looking at the TV, or so I thought. I popped up to go to the bathroom, and when I came out, I discovered why he was so quiet. The whole time he was sitting there, HE WAS DRAWING ALL OVER HIMSELF...WITH A PURPLE SHARPIE!!!

Now this Sharpie had been missing for a few days, since Friday night, when I guess it got caught up in my blankets somewhere. Yes, The Little Man had found it, and under the guise of cooperation and silent television viewing, he was creating a permanent masterpiece on his skin. Well, I must admit, I AM a lover of tattoos and body art, but certainly not in this fashion. This is my fault because I didn't search harder for the pen, but I had honestly forgotten then it was even in the bed by then. Believe me, I clear it all out when he comes in here, as he is a Curious George in here. We have a Sleep Number Bed, so he uses the controls to blow the bed chambers up and then release the air. He uses the remotes for the TV, DVD player, and the ceiling fan to his delight until I wrestle them away, if I haven't hidden them before he comes in here. I know enough to toddler-proof as much as possible, even for a movie or nap time in here. I failed miserably today.

* SIGHS *

"Little Man! What are you doing?!" I said to him. He looks directly at me and says, "I color!" and holds the pen out to me. I took it from him and shook my head...what else could I do? What's done is done at this point! I just laughed at him and took the picture you see here. He was happy to pose for photos, as usual, so I took a few before we tried to clean him up. I wasn't sure where to start since this was permanent ink. I decided on baby wipes because they have a bit of alcohol in them, but they won't be too hard on his baby skin. After a dozen wipes and scrubbing for 20 minutes, the drawings are faded but still there. They will fade in a week or so, I'm sure. I'm not too worried. He's not the first child I have to color on themselves with permanent ink, although the unnamed party was definitely NOT a toddler at the time. (If you are reading this, you know who you are, and it did go away eventually!)

Maybe The Little Man has a wonderful art career ahead of him. He does love to paint and color, on everything. He's done my walls, floors, kitchen table, bathtub, couch, front window, coloring books, and now, himself. He's a multimedia artist! I should get him an agent before he turns 3 and he's past his prime.

A haunting good time

The boys had a good time trick-or-treating last night. Their candy haul was substantial as well, same as every year. We buy a bunch, we take a bunch in, so we're even. I don't know why we don't just buy whatever candy we want, save the money we'd spend on costumes, and put it towards our dental bill (both the two older ones have 2 cavities a piece...and I have a crown that needs replacing). I think it probably has a lot to do with the fact that my little friends enjoy themselves immensely!









Here is our Big Man as King Tut. Earlier this year, he had to do a school report on a historical figure, so I made him this costume for it. He has worn it a number of times, so it's seen better days, but he's proud of it nonetheless. Sewing the pleats in was, um, fun. It was too cold here in October to go without clothing underneath, hence the jeans and t-shirt. Can't miss the Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat-ish Pharaoh headpiece either, which he picked out at the costume shop. A little gold never hurt anyone, and a poseable snake is a must-have for this season! He headed out with a pillowcase, like he does every year, and it was about half full upon his return. If you were wondering, that's around 2 gallon bags stuffed full of candy. He was proud of the fact that a bunch of our neighbors told him what a great costume it was because it was so different than the average pirate or princess. I'm glad they did that- it really made him feel good about himself!

Here is our Little Man, sporting a very stylish Pablo costume, from the Backyardigans on Nickelodeon. We were at Target, looking for costumes, when we came across this one. It was apparent from his reaction that we were unable to leave the store without it, so I shelled out the $25 for it so as to not disappoint him. Didn't want to be mean after all! On Halloween night, he fought and kicked and screamed, refusing to put this wonderful piece of polyester on until he had candy in not one, but both hands. He then happily lay there on the floor while Dad snapped and Velcro'd him into it. BTW, I do have to say thanks to the manufacturer of this costume, as they used Mommy common sense with their design of this. It snaps completely up the front and in the entire leg and crotch area, and the belly area is one large flap that just Velcros over the front to cover the snapped area. Way to go! As any parent knows, as soon as you get the littlest ones into a costume, the diaper must be changed or a potty break must be taken, causing a huge production. Thanks for taking this stresser out of this for us this year!

Now hear comes the mean part...

The DIVA was unable to trick-or-treat this year, due to some recent "issues", some of which you might have read about in previous posts! I am standing my ground with her, and I will not allow her privileges if she cannot and will not tow the line around here. She was most disappointed when she started calling me names and had her candy distribution privileges revoked as well. THAT sent her over the edge and she was REALLY mad then. I heard a few more expletives and dodged a few things she threw at me. I wasn't surprised because she has yet to take responsibility for her own actions for these things, but it still bothers me that even when she's in trouble, she continues to dig the hole deeper. We're working on that.

I'm hoping that showing her perseverance in my not backing down will prove that I won't let her get away with this stuff. I think that she gets it, but I know that she's still fighting for control. What she fails to see is that I look at it this way: right now, she's on the road to her future, but she's still in driver's ed. Mom is still there with her foot on the teacher's brake on the passenger's side, to quash the bad judgement when necessary. Someday soon, I won't be there to do that, and she'll be on here own. Sometimes, she'll even wish she were riding in the backseat...I know I do!

All in all, Halloween was fun for everyone. The Big Man even offered to share his candy with The DIVA, which I thought was very nice of him. Strangely nice, as a matter of fact. I'll be keeping an eye on those two- something might be afoot. *raises one eyebrow, deep in thought*